Then
on one blessed day, in the midst of a rather beautiful and bountiful peak of
morning sun, soft music and the sweet smell of pancakes, I handed my mum one
long list of “wanted stuff” including my own pair of Wedges. She was travelling,
and that was my only chance to get some things crossed off my wish list, so
with a sparkling smile of expectation, I whispered one last time:“don’t forget
my Wedges” before her taxi sped off. The day went particularly well, with a rather
warm sweet feeling of abundance and beauty that turned a simple lunch into a
bite of heaven, but before supper was served that taste had turned to bile.
“I
had an accident’, Mum mumbled on the phone, and the sight of her limping shadow
in the flickering moonlight as she returned home was a sudden dart of pain in
my bubbly heart .She threw her blood stained wedges on the floor: an evidence of
her ordeal and the rest of the weekend was followed by a gloomy wave of endless
silence. End results: a long stiff stitch on her legs that spoke volumes of pain
and a strict warning from the doctors: no wedges ever again!
After
the final verdict sunk in, mum took a final peep at her dressing room one
morning and called me from my bedroom to “come for the wedges”. That was
probably something I never thought I would hear her say. But did hearing it
finally bring me that awaited joy? No. I loved those wedges, I had dreamt of
wearing them for nights unending but now, now
I had those desires overtaken by a stronger wish to see mum get better,
recover completely and probably wear her Wedges again! Because out of this
incident, I had learnt that:
1. You
Can’t Just “Go For The Wedges”:
Though
in life, it probably sounds so easy to “Go for the Wedges“; That is, go for the
life of glamour and grandeur, probably just get to that position in a leap, or
try to sound or look like other people you admire etc. the truth is that you
really are just trying to “Go for their Wedges” without knowing or even
considering the pain, loss, challenges and disappointments they had to go
through before and after their present
destination. You cannot look like
anybody and neither can you have real self discovery if you keep walking in “inherited
shoes”. Every shoe (life’s calling or path) has its unique story, and pain is
part of that story! The pain and discomfort is only known to the original
wearer. It may look good on you, but you do yourself the disservice of acting
like you “own the Wedges” when you have not gone through the growth process of
maturing enough to fit in them and wear them right, with the right lessons
involved.
2. Scars
mean more than “pain”:
With time, mum’s wounds have healed
but the scar still says a lot. It says a lot about a permanent transition from
“Wedges” to “flat shoes and loafers”. When she looks at her scars, there is
probably some form of a reminder of that change from a natural perfect state to
a distorted discomforting place of hurt. Such is the state of anyone who goes
through a loss of any kind, or a change in original condition ( wealth, health,
birth etc). But do the scars of life take away life’s beauty or add to it? Do
scars represent pain alone or victory over pain? Whether emotional, physical or
psychological, scars in themselves are not our doom, it is the way we handle and see them that matters most. The scars of life are a symbol of survival.
Many people have transformed their scars into great books, movies and
Associations that generations have benefitted from. So the
question is "what are you doing with your scars? "And "how do you even see your
scars" in the first place? Do you see them as those despicable, unforgettable
mishaps that will forever be your loss or do you see them as the jewels of
change and strength that can help you see better, live life more wisely, choose
better and appreciate better. Indeed
scars mean more than pain and do carry their purification and beautification
agents. If you look carefully, you will see that indeed, a life well lived is a life that knows the
beauty of its scars.
3. Pain
teaches what luxury ignores:
Could
it possibly be that pain reminds us of the blessing of being without pain?
Could it be that that reminder channels our focus on the things that matter most
and incline us to want less “stuff” and more of what our soul needs? The daunting truth about life is that the one
who loses his shoes is finally grateful he did not lose his feet, and the one
who unfortunately loses his feet is finally thankful for his life. But in the
absence of pain, we tend to take for granted the great gifts of “good feet” and
“walking legs”. Or in simple terms, pain teaches what luxury ignores. Though
pain is no body’s wish, not even the Creator’s desire, is it not also a matter of fact, that in
luxurious moments of our lives we are less on our guard ? Do some people not
remove the boundaries of inhibition, and go overboard when prosperity comes
their way? Others also live by self
induced philosophies of life and of pleasure and they feel in control of life
and destiny by virtue of their wealth. Well, let’s not forget that there is
enough pain around us to teach us daily secrets of wisdom that luxury may
ignore . So, if we could only learn from the pains of the past/present, and of
the pains of others, we could learn a more modest approach to life which will
keep our soul in harmony and our body in check. !!!
Written
By: Alice Blighton
